lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 11:54 AM
Hello my brothers and sisters in the Lord,
I would like to apologize to everyone here who had to see a side of me that is very atypical for me. I found myself caught up in arguing with those who are my brethren. I am a moderator and I am ashamed for not being more cautious with my words and with my manner of conduct. To this I hope you will forgive me for my contentiousness, something I have been blaming others with. I find it hard to moderate as I feel guilty having to make judgments when it's my own heart I should be judging first.
With that said, I will also apologize for the postings I made that could have led some of you into false doctrine. There is some truth in the links/paragraphs I had posted, but not all was truth and this is where some have told me and pointed it out... I have apologized and made an explicit warning before posting things that my views/beliefs could seem 'out there' to some so to read with discernment.
I have been studying for almost 9 years with an online group, doing some transcription and probably getting into spiritual areas that are 'deeper' than most would go. I do not say this with pride or with an elitist attitude... I don't feel I am more spiritual than the rest, so if any of you feel that I have done that, I truly humble myself before you and ask for your forgiveness. I am just as eager as you all are to bring the words of truth, spiritual truth, and put them out for those who may discern. I found yesterday that this is not something that is welcomed and is deemed heretical or off the wall. Again, my apologies.
I am in need of your prayers more than anything to help lead me back to where I need to be. In some ways I feel like I have lost my first love and I am desperately seeking it again, but finding all the wrong answers. I do not mean to lead any into deception, but wish the Lord's blessings and protection on all here. I have had a lot of family issues, as well as forum issues with moderating and keeping on track, and even feeling super guilty about being online as I know the Lord is telling me that I need to be spending time with Him and not just talking about Him or trying to learn from others. I need to learn from HIM. He is Truth, and there are many false witnesses out there who are there to deceive the masses. I do not want to fall into the trap and snare of the Evil One who is the Destroyer. I want to be built up in Him, to be filled with all His fullness, and to be able to discern better.
If you could all find it in your hearts to pray for me that I do not continue on a fruitless path to my own destruction, I would really appreciate it.
I find peace and comfort here and I am a peaceable, teachable person with a heart for God and for all... I am raising children and wish for them to be taught only the Truth, and this is my Hope for now and for the future.
God bless you all today and always,
Rose
Pamela
Apr 20 2006, 12:04 PM
Rose may the Lord guide you into all truth and understanding in all things regarding Him and His word.
You know the devil comes in to kill, steal and destroy. Rose you stepped out on a ledge and posted your fear. This fear was not from the Lord as the Lord does not give us a spirit of fear. You have received tremendous love, hope and prayer regarding this fear. You have received other help as well. Now with this said, do you really think the enemy enjoyed watching you come up out of this fear, or receiving so much help here from all your buds? NOPE, so it does not surprise me, the he is attempting to damage your witness here on this forum.
Rose your okay, keep going forward in HIM!
P.S. This took tremendous courage on your part as well, and this is you pressing through and resisting the devil... PRAISE GOD! You see it has nothing to do with the mean words spoken, because we don't fight a flesh and blood battle. Its all a spiritual thing.....Keep resisting that ol' enemy will flee....
Roxygal
Apr 20 2006, 12:06 PM
Oh Rose, your heart is so wonderfully open. I so admire you for that. I can definately relate with the pulling in several direction feelings and the guilt of not spending more time with Him. Life has a way of getting in the way sometimes!
But you are a shining light for me. You spread your soul open without fear of attack even when you know it's inevitable. You search for the Truth and want to share... there is nothing wrong with that. It's our responsibility to pray for discernment and guidance before we read anything! So if your quest for the truth has brought up questionable things to you... How else do we learn? If we can't openly share without fear of being attacked... well, we won't learn too much will we?
I say keep on keepin on girlie! Keep searching for the truth and sharing it! We'll climb together!!!
I will keep you always in my prayer, Rose!!
Love you so much!!!
Lisa
Kansasdad
Apr 20 2006, 12:08 PM
Rose,
You are being WAAAAAAAAY too hard on yourself. Just remember, God is in control, and he will use you to spread his message and if you mess-up, he will use that as well. Lord knows I have NEEEEEEVer been wrong, so being how it is now well established that I am never wrong, I would say you are doing just fine, you have a heart for God and he is using you as his vessel. You believe me on that never being wrong part ......right
Hang in there Girl your doing great!
God Bless,
Kansas Dad
PraisingYeshua
Apr 20 2006, 12:13 PM
Rose~
I know I am new to the forum, but I wanted to say thank you. Not because I have seen any of the action to which you refer, but for being humble enough to apologise, for something you feel had occured. That says so much about your character, and without doubt, I can easily see that you are wallking with Him, and that He is indeed walking with you. I look forward to your future posts; you are an amazing woman of G-d, and I thank you for that.
lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 12:18 PM
Okay, I think I need to have a good cry for myself... you all are so special and yesterday I really thought I had lost you all. Pamela, that was an awesome word and yes, I do believe Satan would have his way to mess up my witness... I have felt the burden for the last few weeks... and it came to a head yesterday.
KansasDad... yup, I almost believed you!
Lisa, you're the best, you always have something nice to say... I pray you are well now and the Lord gives you the desire of your heart!
PraisingY... you are so welcome here and I thank YOU for your kind words about me. I love the Lord so much and don't ever want to lose control again.. it felt so WEIRD and involuntary... I am glad that's over with!
Thank you all greatly, from the bottom of my (humbled) heart.
To HIM be all GLORY and HONOR and PRAISE! This forum is so anointed and there is TRUTH here... I just need to stop looking where I don't belong. Love you all!
Adonaicole
Apr 20 2006, 12:20 PM
Rose,
Your letter shows just how beautiful you are and how your heart is full of love for him.
You are in my prayers, as I pray for you and your family. You are also in my prayers, as I thank God for such a beautiful shining light. Keep up the good work and never get discouraged but trust in him to lead the way.
Your brother in Christ,
Don
onetiggerroo
Apr 20 2006, 12:28 PM
ducktapehero
Apr 20 2006, 01:01 PM
His love abides
Apr 20 2006, 01:08 PM
Rose, I pray the Lord will bless you. You are such a sweet and gentle person. That old enemy keeps trying to sneak in and cause trouble but our Father is greater. Hold onto HIM and all will be fine. (((HUGS)))
PraisingYeshua
Apr 20 2006, 01:08 PM
QUOTE(ducktapehero @ Apr 20 2006, 01:01 PM)
Typical man!

(Just kidding!!!)
lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 01:55 PM
God bless all of you,
Don, Tig, DTH, His Love, and thanks for the humor PraisingY.... you guys are all so wonderful and have such encouragement, it's easy to admit something here, I never fail to have a cheering section with Banners High saying THE LORD LOVES YOU! I really feel so much better today and I know it's because of your prayers and love. I am hanging onto Jesus, you bet! Thank you all again, you're the best friends anyone could have!
chrio39
Apr 20 2006, 02:07 PM
QUOTE(lifeinhim61 @ Apr 20 2006, 01:55 PM)
God bless all of you,
Don, Tig, DTH, His Love, and thanks for the humor PraisingY.... you guys are all so wonderful and have such encouragement, it's easy to admit something here, I never fail to have a cheering section with Banners High saying THE LORD LOVES YOU! I really feel so much better today and I know it's because of your prayers and love. I am hanging onto Jesus, you bet! Thank you all again, you're the best friends anyone could have!
[right][snapback]55463[/snapback][/right]
Hey Rose, I just saw this thread. I'm glad that you're feeling better. Now onward...
lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 03:52 PM
Amen David! Thank you so much... you're a super blessing to me today ;-)
Shaun333
Apr 20 2006, 06:13 PM
I just noticed this thread. Before I do take a break for a couple of days, I thought I would also put in my cents worth.
Since we already did the PM thing, you know how it is Rose.
You are legitimate and certainly do have a heart for Jesus.
We can all be deceived at any time. The minute that anyone thinks they are immune to deception is the moment that it will happen. That's why I always pray not to be deceived. It's a prayer I hold dear and God has blessed me greatly in granting me discernment.
It's ALL God, not me.
Certain prayers need to keep being prayed and this for me, is one of them.
It has helped me greatly.
It certainly takes guts to put up a thread like this and I commend you for it. Ya got style, babe.
lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 06:42 PM
Shaun, you bring tears to my eyes! Yes, I got your PM and I appreciate your forgiveness. I really thank all of you for being such a great family to me... you're the best!
Will be praying that prayer for you Shaun... I appreciate you and the cool head you always have about you. :-)
Messiahiscoming
Apr 20 2006, 07:57 PM
Rose,
You are so precious and I admire so many great qualities about you!
To start with you have one of the biggest hearts Ive ever encountered.
You are also not afraid to stand for what you believe in. What a strong
person you are! Yet the quality I admire the most is your humbleness!
Your are so quick to seek forgiveness and admit your faults and weaknesses.
God has blessed me by bringing your friendship into my life.
I love you!
MOM
MESSIAHISCOMING
lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 08:01 PM
Mom,
Thanks! You guys have really said so much to me to keep me going here... I have had a rough time of it of late, but it never fails that when I feel at the end of my rope, that God leads me back here and I am picked right back up again. You all are so sweet and loving, opening your arms and taking back the prodigal daughter! I feel like one of them when something like this happens, and you are all there to just give me the boost I need. I love you all so much!
chrio39
Apr 20 2006, 08:30 PM
QUOTE(lifeinhim61 @ Apr 20 2006, 08:01 PM)
Mom,
Thanks! You guys have really said so much to me to keep me going here... I have had a rough time of it of late, but it never fails that when I feel at the end of my rope, that God leads me back here and I am picked right back up again. You all are so sweet and loving, opening your arms and taking back the prodigal daughter! I feel like one of them when something like this happens, and you are all there to just give me the boost I need. I love you all so much!
[right][snapback]55562[/snapback][/right]
Prodigal you say? Nay, but human! And humble to boot.
Messiahiscoming
Apr 20 2006, 08:33 PM
QUOTE(chrio39 @ Apr 20 2006, 07:30 PM)
QUOTE(lifeinhim61 @ Apr 20 2006, 08:01 PM)
Mom,
Thanks! You guys have really said so much to me to keep me going here... I have had a rough time of it of late, but it never fails that when I feel at the end of my rope, that God leads me back here and I am picked right back up again. You all are so sweet and loving, opening your arms and taking back the prodigal daughter! I feel like one of them when something like this happens, and you are all there to just give me the boost I need. I love you all so much!
[right][snapback]55562[/snapback][/right]
Prodigal you say? Nay, but human! And humble to boot.
[right][snapback]55574[/snapback][/right]
Humble yes I agree!

Love You,
Mom
jhamner
Apr 20 2006, 08:39 PM
Rose... I just love you. Your spirit is so kind and so sweet.
You give mercy and you shall receive it.
I do want to repeat something another said- don't be so hard on yourself. Sometimes the hardest person to grant mercy to is ourselves.
You are truly beautiful. HUGS HUGS HUGS!
May Jesus shine His light on you and breathe peace on you today.
RosielovesJesus
Apr 20 2006, 08:56 PM
Oh Rose, you are a sweetheart that is for sure.
I prayed for you, for me, for all of us-into the late hours.
God loves you Rose-He is never going to let you go.
We are all human and sometimes I think my middle name
is goofed up again. But I didn't goof up when I knew in my
heart that you were always nice and love our Lord and you
are still nice and love our Lord. God doesn't make mistakes
Rose and when He made you, He made a real gem.
I just got on the net a few minutes ago. And read your post,
and thought yes that is our Rose, so lay it on the line kind of
gal and she's my pal. I have always admired you in every way.
We all get tired sometimes and I will be the first to say
that I have been extremely tired lately and shouldn't have
asked a few things. So I ask for forgivness too.
We are human and we need our Lord. He is here and we love
Him and Rose we love you.
So now we have asked for forgivness, and God doesn't remember
it and we won't either. Let's move on because the love is
shining here.
love,
rosie
lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 09:08 PM
Oh Rosie, thanks! And to Julie too!
I don't want to sound like a broken record... but you all are the best family I could ever want, even closer than my own. I would hate to think I have hurt or offended any of you... I sure do lay it all out but it's worth it because I'm in training for judgment day... I want nothing to be hid... I don't hold grudges and I don't like secrets! Out and over with. Thanks for being so loving and forgiving, and yes, moving on! That's the way to go. Bless you all for the love you show here and every day!
lifeinhim61
Apr 20 2006, 09:10 PM
QUOTE(chrio39 @ Apr 20 2006, 09:30 PM)
QUOTE(lifeinhim61 @ Apr 20 2006, 08:01 PM)
Mom,
Thanks! You guys have really said so much to me to keep me going here... I have had a rough time of it of late, but it never fails that when I feel at the end of my rope, that God leads me back here and I am picked right back up again. You all are so sweet and loving, opening your arms and taking back the prodigal daughter! I feel like one of them when something like this happens, and you are all there to just give me the boost I need. I love you all so much!
[right][snapback]55562[/snapback][/right]
Prodigal you say? Nay, but human! And humble to boot.
[right][snapback]55574[/snapback][/right]

Thanks David!
RosielovesJesus
Apr 20 2006, 09:20 PM
onetiggerroo
Apr 20 2006, 09:35 PM
“There is a fountain filled with blood – drawn from Immanuel’s veins; and sinners plunged beneath that flood; lose all their guilty stains.”
The strongholds are coming down...PRAISE THE LORD!
The Healing Balm of our SAVIOR and LORD is present! Thank you Jesus!
It is peaceful once more!
Humble Bob
Apr 20 2006, 10:25 PM
QUOTE(lifeinhim61 @ Apr 20 2006, 11:54 AM)
Hello my brothers and sisters in the Lord,
I would like to apologize to everyone here who had to see a side of me that is very atypical for me. I found myself caught up in arguing with those who are my brethren. I am a moderator and I am ashamed for not being more cautious with my words and with my manner of conduct. To this I hope you will forgive me for my contentiousness, something I have been blaming others with. I find it hard to moderate as I feel guilty having to make judgments when it's my own heart I should be judging first.
With that said, I will also apologize for the postings I made that could have led some of you into false doctrine. There is some truth in the links/paragraphs I had posted, but not all was truth and this is where some have told me and pointed it out... I have apologized and made an explicit warning before posting things that my views/beliefs could seem 'out there' to some so to read with discernment.
I have been studying for almost 9 years with an online group, doing some transcription and probably getting into spiritual areas that are 'deeper' than most would go. I do not say this with pride or with an elitist attitude... I don't feel I am more spiritual than the rest, so if any of you feel that I have done that, I truly humble myself before you and ask for your forgiveness. I am just as eager as you all are to bring the words of truth, spiritual truth, and put them out for those who may discern. I found yesterday that this is not something that is welcomed and is deemed heretical or off the wall. Again, my apologies.
I am in need of your prayers more than anything to help lead me back to where I need to be. In some ways I feel like I have lost my first love and I am desperately seeking it again, but finding all the wrong answers. I do not mean to lead any into deception, but wish the Lord's blessings and protection on all here. I have had a lot of family issues, as well as forum issues with moderating and keeping on track, and even feeling super guilty about being online as I know the Lord is telling me that I need to be spending time with Him and not just talking about Him or trying to learn from others. I need to learn from HIM. He is Truth, and there are many false witnesses out there who are there to deceive the masses. I do not want to fall into the trap and snare of the Evil One who is the Destroyer. I want to be built up in Him, to be filled with all His fullness, and to be able to discern better.
If you could all find it in your hearts to pray for me that I do not continue on a fruitless path to my own destruction, I would really appreciate it.
I find peace and comfort here and I am a peaceable, teachable person with a heart for God and for all... I am raising children and wish for them to be taught only the Truth, and this is my Hope for now and for the future.
God bless you all today and always,
Rose
[right][snapback]55411[/snapback][/right]
Rose, you're a real sparkplug! I like that

. Don't you change unless it's the Lord changing you and I believe that he is!
Signet
Apr 20 2006, 10:33 PM
Dear Sister Rose,
It takes courage to live, and it takes courage to step out in faith, and it takes
courage to ask God to take the blinders off, and then be willing to "see". It's ok
to be outthere just as long as you promise to come back! You are loved...
you are His...no judgements...sometimes a little righteous indignation is just the
thing we need to realize we are dependent upon Him...I will borrow this that has
already been posted, "What are you looking at"? Yeah, me too. My best Friend.
your friend, Signet
lifeinhim61
Apr 21 2006, 07:14 AM
Tig, yup, the strongholds are a comin down! We are at peace...
Thank you HB, I can be a sparkplug for sure... it's that redhead in me... or the Irish, don't know which is worse! LOL I appreciate your kindness to me.
Signet, thanks for being my friend... Loved your comment... I want to SEE what God wants for me!
Love you ALL!
chrio39
Apr 21 2006, 11:41 AM
QUOTE(lifeinhim61 @ Apr 21 2006, 07:14 AM)
Tig, yup, the strongholds are a comin down! We are at peace...
Thank you HB, I can be a sparkplug for sure... it's that redhead in me... or the Irish, don't know which is worse! LOL I appreciate your kindness to me.
Signet, thanks for being my friend... Loved your comment... I want to SEE what God wants for me!
Love you ALL!
[right][snapback]55665[/snapback][/right]
Gees! You, Miche, God knows who else is an Irish readhead around here. We need lots of prayer guys, and a little protection too!
Miche
Apr 21 2006, 11:47 AM
Humility is so beautiful. Makes you seem even prettier then you are.
Hugs to you.
lifeinhim61
Apr 21 2006, 12:03 PM
Miche, thanks. I am so sorry for letting you down. I am honored to be here... and I appreciate your taking the time to read this and for the sweet compliment. I have been praying for you and your family. Let us know how you're doing if you can.
Love, Rose
God's Lamb
Apr 21 2006, 01:56 PM
Hi Rose
I just caught this thread.....I guess I missed the thread you are talking about.
Puh-leeeze you are waaaay to hard on yourself. Your letter was so open and so sweet. You are such a blessing to me and to the rest of his here. You have a sweet and gentle spirit full of Jesus's love....and when I read your threads Rose I see Jesus. What a great example you are!
Do we make mistakes, yes....Gosh, I need someone to slap the "ducktape" across my mouth at times. And I am sure their are a few here that would be more than happy to volunteer to do the job!

I won't say names I'll just point and whistle...
"We're angel's with dirty faces" I'm humming that song.....Have you ever heard that song? We're not the wolves.....here.

Well, a few slip in now and then....but generaly most are God's children here.
But, I know how you feel....

Boy, do I know! My mouth gets ingaged sometimes before my brain does....(that was a flood of unwanted memories...flash

)
But, there is a "Spirit of Fear"....that is moving across this land....and into our lives....and we need to rebuke it. We see it everyday in the newspaper, on TV, and in our local cities. But, God is moving....and when He moves We need to move with Him....as we rebuke this spirit of "fear" that surrounds us daily.
When you learn new things you want to share them with others. And that is a good thing. We are all learning everyday here....I know I am. And I am growing...not as fast as I want....Arrrrrghhh....but never the less I am still growing.
Being a monitor is not an easy job. And so far I am truly amazed at you all.....you are such a blessing and so comforting to me and others. We may disagree....that's okay. We may become passionate.....that's okay. We are all here because of one thing......we love the Lord....and we want to fellowship with one another. We are like a "Band of Brothers"....we are here for each other....through the thick and the thin.....
God Bless.
You are my Sister-in-Christ.....Love you Rose

God Bless.

marie<><
stormdreamer
Apr 21 2006, 03:18 PM
Sweet Rose, my heart goes out to you.
Your a wonderful child of God, and He has revealed His love and joy in you. You have praised His name many times in this forum and so many have learned so much from you. And even in taking the time and having the courage to admit your sin, many are learning what a loving and forgiving God He is. As you have seen you are loved here by many, and we are praying for you. We are all learning and growing and "trying" to mature in our faith. It's funny, just when "we" think, (and I say this for myself as well), that we are mature christians, we soon learn the hard way, and end up falling smack dab on our butts for all to see. But thankfully, many of us with "sore" butts, are right there with you to help you get back up. RIGHT GUYS!! I pray that the Lord has given you peace now and gives you the time you need to be still, and be with Him. Know that He delights in you Rose.
I'm with you my sister!
Sandra
Miche
Apr 21 2006, 07:16 PM
QUOTE(chrio39 @ Apr 21 2006, 08:41 AM)
QUOTE(lifeinhim61 @ Apr 21 2006, 07:14 AM)
Tig, yup, the strongholds are a comin down! We are at peace...
Thank you HB, I can be a sparkplug for sure... it's that redhead in me... or the Irish, don't know which is worse! LOL I appreciate your kindness to me.
Signet, thanks for being my friend... Loved your comment... I want to SEE what God wants for me!
Love you ALL!
[right][snapback]55665[/snapback][/right]
Gees! You, Miche, God knows who else is an Irish readhead around here. We need lots of prayer guys, and a little protection too!

[right][snapback]55722[/snapback][/right]
protection???? from little ol me????

you have no idea.........
lifeinhim61
Apr 21 2006, 08:06 PM
Marie, Sandra, THANK YOU! You guys mean the world to me and I'm just so glad that all is well now... I didn't like how I was feeling for the last couple of days and it's a way better day now that I got it all out in the open... I am one of those open book people... Thanks so much again, I appreciate and love all of you so much!
Miche... yup, Irish redheads... this is the problem! LOL...
senteami3
Apr 21 2006, 08:31 PM
I sometimes feel like that too. What's good is you have a humble attitude.
I pray that the LORD guides you in Truth, and that He keeps you humble and willing to accept correction. I pray that He will give you the will, the desire and the Grace to do so, so you will be able to stay in the race, and not lose your crown, and make it to Heaven, even when times are the hardest. (I am praying this for myself too
Satan is tricky. I can feel his attacks each time I pray to God. I hear bad words inserted that make me blush. I makes me even more humble.
To tell you the truth, people don't like what I say. They think I am crazy, but hey, this is the world for you!
So if people think you are crazy, good for you if you endure and do it for Jesus Christ. Who cares what the world thinks when it's up to our eternal life? What counts? For what does it profit man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul, what will he give in exchange for his soul?
Keep on praying, like I do. And keep praising him for the good things he gives you. Even if its not much, its more than more of the people of this world have; and alas many will be lost.
(tears, tears...)
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