VCR's do not eject 'PB & J' sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

Ha Ha..you guys are so silly!

I'm so glad the Lord gave me a dorky personality instead of a stuffy uptight one!!! My children are just as goofy as me!

Thanks Don....I feel blessed beyond measure!

Hey...Baldy man eh? Too bad I'm already taken...Ha Ha..
I'll check the link out too. Thanks sweetie! (Oh gosh....that guy is goofy too!)

A 3-year-old tells all from his mother's restroom stall.
By Shannon Popkin

My little guy, Cade, is quite a talker. He loves to communicate and does it
quite well. He talks to people constantly, whether we're in the library,
the grocery store or at a drive-thru window. People often comment on how
clearly he speaks for a just-turned-3-year-old. And you never have to ask
him to turn up the volume. It's always fully cranked. There've been
several embarrassing times that I've wished the meaning of his words would
have been masked by a not-so-audible voice, but never have I wished this
more than last week at Costco.
Halfway, through our shopping trip, nature called, so I took Cade with me
into the restroom. If you'd been one of the ladies in the restroom that
evening, this is what you would have heard coming from the second to the
last stall:
"Mommy, are you gonna go potty? Oh! Why are you putting toiwet paper on the
potty, Mommy? Oh! You gonna sit down on da toiwet paper now? Mommy, what are
you doing? Mommy, are you gonna go stinkies on the potty?"
At this point I started mentally counting how many women had been in the
bathroom when I walked in. Several stalls were full ... 4? 5? Maybe we
could wait until they all left before I had to make my debut out of this
stall and reveal my identity.
Cade continued, "Mommy, you ARE going stinkies aren't you? Oh, dats a good
girl, Mommy! Are you gonna get some candy for going stinkies on the potty?
Let me see doze stinkies, Mommy! Oh .. Mommy! I'm trying to see in dere. Oh!
I see dem. Dat is a very good girl, Mommy. You are gonna get some candy!"
I heard a few faint chuckles coming from the stalls on either side of me.
Where is a screaming newborn when you need her? Good grief. This was really
getting embarrassing. I was definitely waiting a long time before exiting.
Trying to divert him, I said, "Why don't you look in Mommy's purse and see
if you can find some candy we'll both have some!" "No, I'm trying to see
doze more stinkies. Oh! Mommy!" He started to gag at this point. "Uh oh,
Mommy. I fink I'm gonna frow up. Mommy, doze stinkies are making me frow
up!! Dat is so gross!!"
As the gags became louder, so did the chuckles outside my stall. I quickly
flushed the toilet in hopes of changing the subject. I began to reason with
myself: OK. There are four other toilets. If I count four flushes, I can be
reasonably assured that those who overheard this embarrassing monologue will
be long gone.
"Mommy! Would you get off the potty, now? I want you to be done going
stinkies! Get up! Get up!" He grunted as he tried to pull me off.
Now I could hear full-blown laughter. I bent down to count the feet
Outside my door.
"Oh, are you wooking under dere, Mommy? You wooking under da door?
What were you wooking at, Mommy? You wooking at the wady's feet?"
More laughter. I stood inside the locked door and tried to assess the
situation.
"Mommy, it's time to wash our hands, now. We have to go out now, Mommy."
He started pounding on the door. "Mommy, don't you want to wash your
hands? I want to go out!!"
I saw that my "wait 'em out" plan was unraveling. I sheepishly opened
The door, and found standing outside my stall, twenty to thirty ladies
Crowded around the stall, all smiling and starting to applaud. My first
thought was complete embarrassment, then I thought, "Where's the fine print
on the 'motherhood contract' where I signed away every bit of my dignity and
privacy?" But as my little boy gave me a big, cheeky grin while he
rubbed bubbly soap between his chubby little hands, I thought,
I'd sign it all away again, just to be known as Mommy to this little fellow.

(Shannon Popkin is a freelance writer and mother of three. She lives
with her family in Grand Rapids, Michigan, where she no longer uses public
restrooms)